Couples Therapy

Couples therapy aims to improve romantic relationships and resolve interpersonal conflicts. It is estimated that nearly half of all married couples get divorced and about one in five marriages experience distress at some time. Challenges with affection, communication, disagreements and fears of divorce are some of the most common reasons couples choose to seek couples therapy. Couples who are dissatisfied with their relationship may turn to couples counseling for growing and learning

Before a relationship between individuals can begin to be understood, it is important to recognize and acknowledge that each person, including the counselor, has a unique personality, perception, set of values and history. Individuals in the relationship may adhere to different and unexamined value systems. Institutional and societal variables (like the social, religious, group and other collective factors) which shape a person's nature and behavior are considered in the process of counseling and therapy. A tenet of relationship counseling is that it is intrinsically beneficial for all the participants to interact with each other and with society at large with optimal amounts of conflict. A couple's conflict resolution skills seem to predict divorce rates.

Most relationships will get strained at some time, resulting in a failure to function optimally and produce self-reinforcing, maladaptive patterns. These patterns may be called "negative feedback loops." There are many possible reasons for this, including insecure attachment, ego, arrogance, jealousy, anger, greed, poor communication/understanding or problem solving, ill health, third parties and so on.

Changes in situations like financial state, physical health, and the influence of other family members can have a profound influence on the conduct, responses and actions of the individuals in a relationship.

Often it is an interaction between two or more factors, and frequently it is not just one of the people who are involved that exhibit such traits. Relationship influences are reciprocal: it takes each person involved to make and manage problems. It has been shown that couples therapy works better when couples seek help early.

A viable solution to the problem and setting these relationships back on track may be to reorient the individuals' perceptions and emotions - how one looks at or responds to situations and feels about them. Perceptions of and emotional responses to a relationship are contained within an often unexamined mental map of the relationship, also called a love map by John Gottman. These can be explored collaboratively and discussed openly. The core values they comprise can then be understood and respected or changed when no longer appropriate. This implies that each person takes equal responsibility for awareness of the problem as it arises, awareness of their own contribution to the problem and making some fundamental changes in thought and feeling.

  • To provide a confidential dialogue, which normalizes feelings
  • To improve communication
  • To enable each person to be heard and to hear themselves
  • To change the view of the relationship
  • To provide a mirror with expertise to reflect the relationship's difficulties and the potential and direction for change
  • To empower the relationship to take control of its own destiny and make vital decisions
  • To deliver relevant and appropriate information
  • To set clear goals and objectives

Couples Therapy in Roseville, CA Allows You

  • To expand and re-organize key emotional responses in the relationship
  • To facilitate a shift in partners' interaction to new patterns of interaction
  • To foster a secure attachment between partners
  • To help maintain a state of intimacy between partners


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